I doubt there should be sneaking at all. If there is, all helmets need to come with huge spot/listen bonuses. And haste=bad. Since when do machine guns give a better chance to dodge bullets? If there was some extra attacks/round feature...
I doubt there should be sneaking at all. If there is, all helmets need to come with huge spot/listen bonuses. And haste=bad. Since when do machine guns give a better chance to dodge bullets? If there was some extra attacks/round feature...
Ah, overlooked that.
Better idea. Give a crossbow the Rapid Reload feat and see what happens...that's assuming they don't have it already.
WHAT NINE THOUSANDOriginally Posted by Wikipedia
Ban the feat and let it be a bonus feat for certain guns.
Yes. On the topic of CSing, I don't intend to make sneak builds useless, just to limit that build to where it can be actually fought. If you're getting attacked by a melee sneak, you need only have an archer on your team or be an archer to be able to compete. That said, it's not as if everyone should switch to archers since mages > archers. Also, I may limit the haste bonus for Rogues to about 25%, but then they'd be better off hasteless since the melee they're trying to kill has the full bonus.
WHAT NINE THOUSAND
Ok then. Make a radar item that, when used, somehow makes apparent the location of every player around you, like cast a 0-damage Ray of Frost on everyone. The little frost effect will (hopefully) show up, and the sneak is exposed. And of course, since sneaking kills your movement, a good grenade into a chokepoint is a GREAT deterrent. Of course, no one said we had to keep strictly to Halo weapons, so we can make all sorts of crazy stuff, like...
Flamethrower: Heavy Crossbow. Bolts deal no actual damage but cast Burning Hands instead. Can also sacrifice certain bolts to use Wall of Fire.
Lich Rifle: Mine and mine alone. Bolts deal massive cold damage and slow the target.
Acid Rifle: Light Crossbow that fires bolts that cast Melf's Acid Arrow on contact.
Spread Shotgun: Heavy Crossbow with, again, no real damage, but casts LMS on hit.
Magnum: Sling with incredibly powerful bullets. Ammo is very limited however.
Charger: Use this to charge certain weapons.
Energy Pistol: Shortbow with no real ammo, instead having charges to cast Magic Missile. Has 5 shots, can be overloaded to fire all 5 at once.
Energy Rifle: This one has 30 charges. Missiles come in bursts of 3.
Assassin Rifle: Heavy Crossbow with only 3 bolts per clip bought. Does tons of damage though.
You can think of more. Of course, there needs to be gear to adapt to all of these weapons...
Reflective Armor: Gives Magical DR 5/-. Has a 50% vulnerability to pistols(slings).
Hard Armor: Has 50% immunity to all physical damage. Slows the wielder however, and gives major AC penalties.
Light Armor: Gives +1-5 AC.
Blur Armor: Can cast Entropic Shield.
Stealth Armor: Can cast Invisibility.
Imagination doesn't want to cooperate at the moment. I have to beat on him for more ideas. Also, you could just classify all weapons like so:
Small Arms: Slings
Rapid Fire: Bows
Strong Firearms: Crossbows
Meh.
Illidan: What happen ?
Kael'Thas: Someone set up us the bomb.
Lady Vashj: We get signal.
Illidan: What !
Lady Vashj: Main Screen Turn On.
Illidan: It's you !!
Arthas: How are you gentlemen !! All your base are belong to us. You are on the way to destruction.
Illidan: What you say !!
Arthas: You have no chance to survive make your time. Ha ha ha ha . . . .
Somewhere in the futurepast (events that didn't happen in the past or future)
Furion: What happen ?
Shandris: Someone set up us the bomb.
Tyrande: We get signal.
Furion: What !
Tyrande: Main screen turn on.
Furion: It's you !!
Archimonde: How are you gentlemen !! All your base are belong to us. You are on the way to destruction.
Furion: What you say !!
Archimonde: You have no chance to survive make your time. Ha ha ha ha . . . .
Now for an actual spoof.
Spoof of Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos by AlexKorb
Arthas: Ah, good ‘ol Quel’Thalas. I haven’t been here since I was a boy.
Kel’Thuzad: Be careful. They spam archers, sorcs, and other dastardly stuff.
Arthas: Not if I can help it. Bring forth the prisoner! </dramatization>
Two ghouls escort the prisoner to Arthas.
Prisoner: How’d I get captured again?
Arthas: Now, unelf, tell us how to enter your lands!
Prisoner: The trees will wtfpwn j00! All your tree are belong to us!
Kel’Thuzad: He’s right! Someone set up us the tree!
Arthas: Not if I can help it. Take off every Meat Wagon!
The mad Meat Wagons run over the trees with lightning-fast speed, dropping corpses in their path.
Arthas: ATTACK!
Kel’Thuzad: The magical energies here are strong.
Arthas: What magical energies?
Kel’Thuzad: Oh, the ones that don’t exist.
Arthas: Right…anyway…
The elven base gets wtfpwned by your friend and mine – the Necromancer.
Necromancer: WHEWT! GOGO GHOUL RUSH!
Swordsman: OMG WTF HAX
Kel’Thuzad: “Swordsman”? What is this, Diablo?
Arthas: Why, yes it is.
Kel’Thuzad: It is? Really?
Arthas: No YOU RAVING FOOL. Now make yourself useful and blabber on about how I shouldn’t trust the Dreadlords.
After Arthas’ base gets set up, Sylvanas Windrunner magically appears behind the base, even though there’s no real way to get there. Yet.
Sylvanas Windrunner: Hi. I’m Sylvanas Windrunner. My one purpose in life is to pester you to death by trying to stop you from reaching the Sunwell, then trying to kill you when I get raised as Undead in The Frozen Throne.
Arthas: Ain’t that a mouthful?
DEATH COIL’D
Then, after Meat Wagons mow down the far south trail of bushes (and leave plenty of corpses in their way)…
Archer: O…M…G…
NECROMANCER RUSH OH NOES
In the time span of 2 minutes, the base is rubble. The undead army then goes forth to destroy the blue base, but is suddenly attacked by a huge clone army. Republic Gunships drop troops on the undead, asploding them. 2D shrapnel flies everywhere.
Necromancer: WTF? ~implodes~
Broodling: YARGLE ~desplodes~
Squirrel: ~unsplodes~
Kel’Thuzad: The Jedi have amassed a huge army!
The Star Wars reenactment gets war stomp’d by a Tauren Chieftain/Doom Guard crossbreed.
Arthas: Enough. ~summons Zerglings~ It’s time for a classic Zergling rush.
Well, the Zerglings get there…except they start attacking UBER SLOW since their attack speed got shaved in half in WCIII.
Arthas: Enough of this!
Arthas uses Force Frostmourne Throw on the door, magically opening it.
Arthas: Wheee! I win!
Sylvanas: I would do something extremely strategic right now, but I got teleported right into Arthas’ base, so I’ll just flee.
Dugalle: Hey! That’s my joke- ~DEATH COIL’D~
Arthas: I’m bored. I wanna go play Soulchess.
Kel’Thuzad: Right now, I’m an undead mage. If you want me to become a Frost Nova-spamming undead mage, you’ll bring me to the DAMN SUNWELL!
Arthas: Alright, alright, stop poking me with it.
Text Block'd/10. On the next two parts...
Arthas: Sweet mother of...hold this, will ya?
That's all ya get for free.
Part 2
Arthas: What a fine day to be chasing Sylvanas!
Sylvanas: What a fine day to be chased by a godmodding bad guy!
Arthas: GODMODDING?! I'll make you pay for that! I haven't godmodded since 1 second ago!
They come across a bridge which Sylvanas shoots promptly after crossing it. Yes, it explodes.
Arthas: OMG HAX
Sylvanas: There’s no way you can cross now.
Arthas: O RLY? ~puts on a wizard hat, teleports with it~ Haha! Now I’m across!
Acolyte: What of us, my lord?
Arthas: Oh, well, y’see, there’s a ton of dragonhawks coming to kill you, so if you can just go ahead and die for me, that would be great, thanks.
Crypt Fiends suddenly appear out of nowhere just as the Dragonhawk riders do. They promptly get shot down.
Crypt Fiends: Greetings, death knight!
Kel’Thuzad: I was wondering: Why can’t I be called a Blue Mage? I mean, there’s enough Black and Red mages around…ooh! I know! I wanna be a purple mage! Or maybe a green mage!
Arthas: Shaddup already! </Slippy>
Expansion Pack Necromancer: Greetings, my king. I am the Necromancer with the new voice. As you can see, I sound nothing like the old one-
Necromancer: HERETIC! ~guns him down~
Arthas: My good sir, you have just save all of your comrades’ voices in the cinematics.
Necromancer: Lord Arthas, we have just come up with new technology. We have invented the Death Coil shotgun!
Arthas: Sweet mother of…hold this, will ya, Kelly? ~takes the Death Coil shotgun~
Kel’Thuzad: First of all, it’s Kel’Thuzad. Second, you can’t go far without becoming a paladin without Frostmourne, can you now?
Arthas: Damn you. Fine. ~gives Kel’Thuzad the Death Coil shotgun in exchange for Frostmourne~
Kel’Thuzad: Oh yeah, this’ll be fun. It’s HIGH ELF SEASON! ~goes hunting~
Swordsman: There’s no such thing as- BLARGH ~DEATH COIL’D~
Archer: ~dies from lack of lowercase letters~
Arthas: Well, now we need the moon key to go farther, right? Well…~puts on wizard hat~ Off we go!
Arthas goes into the future and steals the moon key from his future self.
Future Arthas: Hey! I worked hard for that!
Back in the past…
Arthas: Okay, I got it. Let’s go.
Arthas teleports onto the pad where the gate is.
Arthas: I win again!
Sylvanas: ~insert high-elven flaming here~
Arthas: Oooh, shows what you know.
Part 3
Tichondrius warps in.
Tichondrius: Word up, brotha.
Arthas: What’s he saying?
Kel’Thuzad: It’s a slang greeting. I know slang.
Arthas: Aha. Well, tell him that I don’t need his help.
Kel’Thuzad: Yo G. This shizzler’s all good.
Tichondrius: Better be watchin’ out for their homie golems, yo.
Arthas: I only understood half of that.
Tichondrius: It’s cool, it’s cool. ~warps out~
Sylvanas magically gets teleported behind Arthas’ base.
Sylvanas: W00T! Go magic powers!
Arthas: I can do that too!
Arthas puts on his wizard hat, but it gets shot off by an arrow.
Arthas: …that was my favorite wizard hat…~sob~
Arthas turns into the Incredible Hulk and smashes Sylvanas into little tiny bits, occasionally stopping to breathe a bit before resuming.
Necromancer: Lord Arthas, Sylvanas is sending runners to Silvermoon. We must pwn them before they get there.
Arthas: That doesn’t sound too hard…
The ghoul rush that gets sent there reaches there, but suddenly gun barrels sprout from the runner’s shoulders, shooting down the rush.
Arthas: Dammit. At least the Gargoyles have de-meching rays.
Necromancer: We have also invented the Death Coil SMG!
Arthas: DIBS!
Kel’Thuzad: Awww…
Arthas gets the Death Coil SMG and proceeds towards the runner factory/Sylvanas’ base. Yup, it got pwned by Arthas and Arthas alone. Well, maybe there were a few Necromancers involved…
Kel’Thuzad: How many? Like, 50 of them?!
Arthas: Shut up, you damn ghost.
Kel’Thuzad: Racism! I don’t take kindly to that!
Arthas: I would gun you down now but I have to turn Sylvanas into a banshee.
Arthas does so. Moments afterward, Silvermoon gets Banshee rush’d.
Arthas: Whewt! I’ve won three consecutive times! ~Final Fantasy victory theme plays~
Anyway, Kel’Thuzad does get reborn.
Kel’Thuzad: I am reborn as a Lich! The Lich King has granted me eternal life, power, and…more power!
Arthas: So you were going to tell me about the Dreadlords?
Kel’Thuzad: Yeah. First let’s play Death Coil tag.
Arthas: I’m game.
They do so. The reader gets DEATH COIL’D.
Fin.
Mal'Ganis: The blade has your soul, Arthas. It speaks to you through your mind...what does it say?
Arthas: It says that...the bacon-men are coming...
Mal'Ganis: THE BACON-MEN?! QUICK! RUN! HIDE! PANIC! DO SOMETHING!
Arthas: DO SOMETHING!
Necromancer: DO SOMETHING!
Ghoul: DO SOMETHING!
Footman: DO SOMETHING!
Knight: DO SOMETHING!
Gryphon Rider: DO SOMETHING!
(does something)
Toss: Here's your joke back, Mr. Brooks.
Mel Brooks: Thank you! I need it for the Spaceballs DVDs! ~inserts it~
President Scroob: Do something!
Dark Helmet: Do something!
Colonel Sanders: ~raises microphone/walkie talkie thingy to his mouth~ Do something!
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