Blizzard's Pub-More insanity.

[JYAP]

(except I'm a hero and you're not)
(so you die while I can still type)

Let's get back on topic.

Everyone: YEAH!

Who asked you?

You: What about me?

Me: I hate you You.

You: Why did you say my name twice?

Me: Stop referring to yourself in the third person you.

Both of you,shut up.

You: But there's only one of me!

Me: GAH!

(erases that)

[Protoss119]

~That gets erased~

That: NO WAIT- ~erase'd~

Think, JYAP. If my spikes to a helluva lot of damage, why DON'T you think I'm a hero? Oh, and I can always use Invinced Shuttles for inventory.

Xaax: Fool! You shall not take my form! ~spams plague on Hunter~

Hunter: Oh for fu- ~plagued x300~

Xaax: Damn Zero Wing...OK, tell me how I can decrease their cooldown!

Hydra: OK. You have to use-

-=BOOM=-

Xaax: What happen !!

Hydra: Somebody set up us the bomb .

And it went through the entire Zero Wing opening sequence. Again. Meanwhile, Zealot, having been killed by Grunt accidentally FOR THE HORDE (but not before kicking nooblar ass), has respawned at Ling's location with dual UT Sniper Rifles. Muahahahahahahaha.

Zealot: For Adun! ~goes on a sniping spree~

HEADSHOTDOUBLEKILLMULTIKILLULTRAKILLM O N S T E R K I L L

KILLINGSPREERAMPAGEDOMINATINGUNSTOPPABLEGODLIKE

Lurker sees all of this and unburrows in awe.

Lurker: ...holicrap...

Oh, wait, he has a Rain's Scythe gun which is doing much more.

Lurker: Amateur. ~burrows, somehow messes with the engines so they get damaged~

WARNING: SELF-DESTRUCT SEQUENCE INITATED

Lurker: I just shut off the engines, that's all!

Grunt: I must escape FOR THE HORDE!

Zealot: FOR AIUR!

Time for Heroes to escape: 5:00. Time for crew to escape: 5:30:00.

Lurker: No fair- ~shot~

[JYAP]

Shaman: Yo Grunt.

Grunt: FOR THE HORDE!

Shaman: There's a dropship in the hangar. Go get it.

Grunt: FOR THE HORDE!

The party makes its way to the hangar. At the hangar,with 1 minute left...

Trazzac: HALT LAMERS!

BATTLE!

(V()_())V ((>#_#))>===l----- (>-&_&)>- (>@_@)>P -----+===<(*_*<)

BTW,that's,from left to right,Lurker,Footman,Zealot,Grunt,Trazzac.

Lurker burrows!

Footman attacks Trazzac!

((>#_#))>===l----->(*_*)

Trazzac counters!

<--((X_X))---+===<(*_*<)

Footman was KOed! OH NOES!

Wait. TIME!

Trazzac: What is it lamer?

Penalty on Trazzac!

Traz: WTF!

For KOing a party member! Lamers are not allowed to KO party members!

Traz: What is this shi-

PENALTY FOR CURSING THE REF!

A giant divine pillar falls on Trazzac and destroys him utterly.

Rain: Snow,get out of the damn narrator booth!

Snow: Geez...

Lurker: Whatever.

The dropship launches with only 1 second to spare. Unfortunately,the explosion from the ship launches Ling into the dropship,knocking the auto-pilot chip out and sending it into the mountains...

When the party comes to,some weirdo named Armageddon's Psychotic Storyteller is running around killing half-orcs. Yup,they're in EW.

[Protoss119]

Arma's char got deleted and now he's stuck with a new character, Darth Jesus (or at least that was who he was planning to make).

Xaax: Why does this keep happening!

Hydra: It must be because I'm saying-

-=BOOM=-

Xaax: What happen !!

(And blah blah blah.)

Meanwhile, in EW...

Killpeoplewhilerunningreallyfast can be found mugging Krin Devek. Suddenly, Drow Dumbass fires an arrow at Lurker & hides.

Lurker: Hey! ~burrows~

The burrowing becomes the equivalent of an earthquake and it kills Drow Dumbass's stealth mode. Drow Dumbass = Spike'd.

Lurker killed Drow Dumbass for 1337 points.

Lurker: Damn CSers.

Meanwhile, Grunt encounters Caradril Jadystine who has his Plasma Scythe.

Grunt: LOK'TAR OGAR! ~attacks~

Caradril is taking absolutely NO damage due to his now hellish DR (yes, I regeared Caradril). Caradril, with a swipe of his halberd, crits Grunt to his doom.

Caradril Jadystine killed Grunt for 1 points.

Caradril: Durr, I'm helping Drow Awesome's team? I'm stupid. ~head asplodes~

Drow Dumbass's bloodied corpse falls out of the narrator booth.

Caradril Jadystine killed Drow Dumbass for 10 points.

Rary: WTF H4X- ~head asplodes~

Caradril: Eat DR, biotches.

Caradril uses Force Halberd throw to mop the floor with 10 noobs, scoring 10 points each.

Lurker: So how does this concern us?

Oh, right. Anyway, Zealot encounters Caradril who gets HEADSHOTed to death, the UTness of the Sniper Rifles negating his DR. Grunt grabs the Plasma Halberd.

Grunt: My weapon has been reclaimed FOR THE HORDE!

[JYAP]

Then Grunt's halberd becomes a +8 weapon.

Meanwhile,two noobs are trying to figure out Ling's class as Ling tears them to shreds.

Shred: Somebody call?

No Shred,go and pwn some nooblar psychics unworthy of my recognizion.

Shred: YAY! CRUNCH TIME!

Noob Abra: OH GOD NO NOT THE FACE

Moving along,Footman sees Heat roast someone.

Footman: Hiya!

Heat roasts Footman.

Footman: (respawns) Hiya!

Heat swings his halberd golf-style,knocking Footman into the distance. Meanwhile,for no good reason,Blizzard's Pub and the remaining patrons land in EB,where a portal has been set up between EW and EB.

Death Knight: Has hell frozen over yet?

The temperature of Hell,Michigan,reaches -59C. Yes,it has.

Death Knight: Yay-(Muta shoots him)OH GOD IT'S DIGESTING MY PANCREAS!(dies)

[Protoss119]

Xaax: Hmm, what is that?

Hydra: Looks like a downed dreadnought.

Xaax: ...excuse me for a moment.

Xaax enters the downed SSD Executor.

Ling: COLDCOLDCOLDCOLDCOLD

Ling, like the Tazmanian Devil, spins around the Fire Team's portal desperate for warmth.

Hydra: Where the hell is Xaax-

Suddenly, the ground starts to rumble.

Hydra: Oh god.

The rumbling starts to grow.

Priest: He didn't mean that!

The rumbling returns to its normal state. Suddenly, Lurker bursts from the ground with 100 noobs.

Lurker: Happy birthday!

Hydra: ...

Raider: Noobhunt!

Confed sees a noobsair.

Confed: HOLY CRAP! IT IS AN ABOMINATION!

Abomination: And I'm not...?

Corsair: It is a good day to die. ~plagued by Xaax accidentally then shot again by Grunt accidentally FOR THE HORDE~

Another Corsair spawns.

Corsair: It is a good day to die. ~killed by muta splash damage~

Another Corsair spawns.

Corsair: It is a good day to live. NO WAIT- ~head asplodes~

Another Corsair spawns.

Corsair: It is a good day to die. ~crashes into Noobsair~

Confed: What, no swirly-thingies?

A neutron flare spark appears.

Confed: YAY! SWIRLY THINGIES! ~smacked by Axe Noob, guns him down~

Suddenly, 3 hatcheries land on a group of noobs along with a Spawning Pool...

Ling: LINGRUSH

...and a Hydralisk Den & 10000 Mins/Gas.

Hydra: In yo face.

That's right. HYDRA RUSH!!! But suddenly, the ground starts to rumble, much more than Lurker or the G-word combined. The SSD's engines ignite and it speeds through the ice it crashed through and back into the sky.

Xaax: PH34R MY INFESTED SUPER STAR DESTROYER!

The SSD along with the march of 100 Hydras crush the noobs under the many guns.

Lurker: Did we win?

Hydra: Yes...we did. Oh, BTW, Xaax, the tool is called-

-=BOOM=-

Xaax: What happen !

(Blah blah blah)

[JYAP]

Muta: Well then...I'll go fly around.

Muta flies around Deadly Abode randomly. Muta gets gunned down by Serind in a Hail of Arrows attack. Muta respawns and shoots Serind,who retaliates with an Imbued Arrow. Muta respawns and shoots Serind,who...yeah,you get the idea.

Raider: So what else could happen?

Peasant: MILITIA SMASH!(charges at Confed for no real reason)

Confed: (Lockdown'd)

Militia: No fair! I WILL SMASH YOU!

Confed: (aims)

A dot appears on Militia that changes colors rapidly.

.................................................. ................Bardstrike Detected

And from out of nowhere a focused blast of Curse Song from WSE sends Militia flying...flying...flying...holy cow,he's orbitting the earth!

Meanwhile a noob named Drizzt Do'Uden(mistake intended)appears.

Do'Uden: YARRRR-

MG picks him up.

MG: Yay. Noob club better than wood club.

Do'Uden: LET ME DOWN FOUL BEAST!

MG: Me no foul. Me take shower every day.

MG goes around beating the snot out of Drow with his new club. Meanwhile,in a secluded corner of Astral City...

Hunter: You wanna buy a cigar?

Noob: How much?

Peon: Hi Hunter!

Hunter: We're frickin HiPS! How did you-

EXPLODE

Hunter respawns at the pub incredibly charred. He collaspes in front of Batrider.

Batrider: HOW? I MUST LEARN HOW THIS SPECIMAN IS SO THOROUGHLY BURNED!(drags Hunter away)

Wind Rider tries a "flying ward",with help from Doc. As he flies above the Molten Pool,Shaman purges the ward. Sploosh. ^_^

Finally,there's clever posters saying noobs taste good,with a P.S. Ninja rules! Naturally,Kodo doesn't realize it's a trick from The Ninja and goes on a eating spree. And thus my donation ends.

[Protoss119]

New chars.

Dwarven Flying Machine (DFM)- Flies around screaming "Wheeeeeee!" wherever he goes. Somewhat akin to Wind Rider except the former flies. Unfortunately, he does not fly very long.

Meat- The mad trike of death. Runs people over dropping corpses behind it all the time. Think insane metal rock music. Of course, it would be UNREALISTAMACAL if it spoke, so it doesn't talk.

Meanwhile in Astral City...

Noob: LYK OMG STARCRAFT SUX LOL

Xaax: Foolish one! Do not defy the power of the game from which I originate!

Xaax consumes the noob somehow.

Xaax: AAAARRRGGHHH! THE SMALLNESS OF HIS BRAIN IS TOO MUCH! ~barfs him up~

Meanwhile, DFM is flying around randomly.

DFM: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Wind Rider: Of course! A flying machine!

Except Doc is testing an IT cannon which fires and blows him up, crashing him into 1000 noobs.

Nationwide Guy: Life comes at you fast- ~needle spine'd~

Hydra: Just use scourge, sheesh.

Doc: Do you see any scourge? I don't see any scourge!

New Character (Out of story: Not really)

Scourge- R0xx y0ur s0xx.

Doc: Very funny.

Abomination: But we are the scourge-

Suddenly, the Meat Wagon speeds out of nowhere and rams Abom, dropping corpses all over Doc, Hydra, & Abom in the process then continues to ram thousands of noobs.

Confed: That. Thing. Must. Die.

Confed Lockdowns it and goes on a shooting spree but can't blow it up since it does concussive damage. Suddenly, from out of nowhere...

DFM: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeee- ~crashes into the epic forge~

Nope.

Batrider: ~flying on Kukulza~ Wheeeeeeee! ~drops a ton of explosive potions on it~

Except that didn't kill it because I said so.

Batrider: WTF H4X- ~crashes into DFM causing him to launch~

DFM: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee- ~Kukulza rush'd~

Xaax: Damn, he was annoying.

DFM respawns in the air.

DFM: Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Suddenly, a million flying lings rush him.

Xaax: Yeesh, stay dead!

...

DFM: Wheeeeeeeeeeeee- ~God smites him~

[JYAP]

Meanwhile,on the other side of EB,in an uncharted location,Ling,Ghoul,and Grunt explore an unusual area. Don't ask how they got there,they just did.

Ghoul: Where the hell are we?

Grunt: I do not know FOR THE HORDE!

Theodin: Hey! You lot can't come here! This be the unfinished cave area!

Ghoul: And why not?

Theodin: We're still beta-testing it.

A noob walks around in the background. The ground suddenly flips and drops the noob into a spike pit.

Ling: That sounds like fun! WHEEEEEE!

Ghoul: Wait Ling! NO!

Ling bounces all around the place,magically unharmed. Ghoul is trying to catch Ling but falls into every single trap that Ling set off,including a flamestrike trap,several swinging log traps,and a picture of Ghoul's grandmother's feet. Yeah,it's bad.

Theodin: Hm. Needs more ugliness.

Theodin goes Googling for a worse picture than that,despite the fact it had nothing to do with Ling moving too fast to set off traps.

In the meantime,Kodo has rampaged up to a noob,and is about to devour him...

SLICE

The noob falls in two.

Ultralisk: HAH! Beat you to it!

Kodo: Food?

Ultralisk: I'll kill more than you can eat!

Kodo: FOOOOOOOOOOD!

And so Ultralisk and Kodo go off on a rampage,cleaving noobs in twain and devouring them whole. Yeah,Kodo has a GIANT mouth.

Suddenly Communist drillbots emerge from under Xaax,Hydra,and IT.

CLIFFHANGER'D

[Protoss119]

It should be noted that Xaax would have had an attack called Venom, doing 5 for normal Defilers and 10 for hero ones, but that was removed for whatever reason.

~edits so Corpse Wagon says Meat Wagon~