Chapter Glob: RHEORHEROHDOPHKDFLHSHOPWSRHOETJEORHJORL

Title by Jubilex, Demon Prince of Slime. Body by...something that's not milk.

Darth Vader: I'm getting tired of this. Deploy the Pit Fiend.

A box falls into a remote part of Battle.net and bursts, revealing a smoking Pit Fiend...

Meanwhile...

Aribeth: There you are! I don't know where you've been, but you had me-

All: AAAAH!

JYAP pulls a stake-firing crossbow and opens fire upon Aribeth until he's out.

Toss: I thought that only slays vampires.

Aribeth explodes in a million tiny shards.

JYAP: It also slays emo NPCs.

The millions of shards suddenly turn red and form up a stranger.

???: AAAH!

Toss: AHH!

Pillsbury Doughboy: AAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh....?

JYAP: So who's this feller?

???: M A R A T H O N

Toss: Just Kiith-Somtaaw.

Kiith: Heya.

Toss: So, Aribeth's finally gone forever?

JYAP: I wouldn't count her out. She'll be back.

Menice: What do we have to do?

Toss: OMG MENICE! J00 R BACK!

JYAP: We have to go to her coffin and-

Toss is teleported into a foreboding chamber.

Toss: What the hell...where the hell am I?!

A Pit Fiend appears in a big ball of flame.

Pit Fiend: BOW BEFORE THE DUKE OF HELL!

Toss: Can I help you?

Pit Fiend: Yes, you can. I am Rasovah.

Toss: Well, Blablabla, what can I do ya for?

Rasovah: It's Rasovah.

Toss: Whatever.

Rasovah: I require that one of these people be eliminated.

Toss: It's JYAP, isn't it?

Rasovah: Dammit, you're good.

Toss: NO, DAMMIT! I'M EVIL! EEEEVVVIIIILLLL!

Rasovah: Prove it. If you take the blue lolipop, you wake up in your bed and you believe whatever you want to believe. If you take the red lolipop, you stay in wonderland, and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes.

Toss: I can explore the rabbit hole myself.

Rasovah: Gah, forget it. Just sign this contract.

Toss: What does it do?

Rasovah: In exchange for your immortal soul, you get a lifetime supply of Reesee cups.

Toss: SOLD!

Toss signs the contract and Rasovah laughs evilly.

Toss and Rasovah soon meet up with JYAP, Rasovah polymorphed as a human.

JYAP: Where have you been, Toss? Who's this noob?

Rasovah: Noob? Noob?

Toss: Oh. I got teleported into this room and I signed a contract with Blablabla...

Rasovah: IT'S RASOVAH! GET IT RIGHT!

JYAP: Die.

JYAP riddles the Pit Fiend with stakes, killing it automatically.

Toss: Wow. Stakes can kill everything.

JYAP. Yep.

TO BE CONTINUED