I think I won. WOO! (jumps up and down)
(is hit by a extendable boxing glove and falls off a cliff into the water but is caught by a giant whale who spits me out onto the edge of a volcano and is hit by a small meteor to make me roll down the side of the volcano and-aw,screw it)
Ha! I eat Goliath missles for breakfast and Yamato Cannon blasts for brunch! Besides, I'd say the nuclear blast took pretty good care of you long before whales came into the equation.
Don't make me use the secret weapon!
I know what your secret weapon is, and I most certainly do not fear being smothered by hordes of gorgeous, nekkid lingerie models. Do your worst!
(pushes plunger)
SPAM'D!
Vikings: Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!
Those lingerie models are decidedly not gorgeous, although it would seem that they are, in fact, nekkid. Bonus points for the (unintentional) Monty Python setup.
Time for the real secret weapon...(a giant anvil of No-Evasion-For-You! falls on monk,KOing him)
(when monk wakes up,he is tied to a chair forced to watch 1000 hours of BARNEY MUSIC VIDEOS!)
(there is a gun with 2 bullets in it in monk's hand,but next to the bulletproof television is a goth,who will most likely die)
(the real question is,does monk shoot himself after the goth or the goth twice?)
(oh,and for some freakish reason,you get a evasion save VS the bullet)
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Fool! I am immune to mind spells, so your bloated purple saurian's wretched incantations have no effect!
Instead, I force the goth to release me, then hunt you down and shoot you once in each kneecap. Thusly incapacitated, I force you to choke down copious amounts of the pancreas-damagingly sweet "Chocolate covered Suger Fried Icing Smacktee-Loops". The phenomenally high levels of sugar elevate your blood glucose to dangerous heights, sending you into a diabetic coma. Feel the carbs...
(clone asplodes)
Yay clones!
(blows away goth with nearby bazooka)
(teleports monk inside Soul Calibur 2,where he is now battling me)
(Monk's character:Lizardman)
(My character:Mitsurugi with the Damascus Blade)
(monk has a snowball's chance in hell of living,especially since he starts with 50% health)
As they say in Warcraft,ggnore.
*cut away to Monk sitting on his couch playing SC 2*
*easily wastes his opponent, then sits and ponders the metaphysics of the situation*
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