The OFFICIAL Midknight Nine fanfic,by JYAP

[Felonious Monk]

*hic* I love you man.

Work with me, I still have a backlog of fanfic to go through and have to work on my taxes. Yay IRS!

[JYAP]

I know you like it,but what about everyone else?

[Felonious Monk]

Maybe no one is replying because its in a restricted forum and only a few people have access. Wandera, dragoniser, and Al are the only ones that I know of that could actually read it and none of them post very often. In fact, I don't think I've ever seen dragoniser post...

[JYAP]

Ohhhhh...oh well. Onto the next episode!

Next Day

Slicey

Insert WTF look on Tymothi's alliance,now feeling small. Not much going on cept for that 1 incident...

Ellador:I shall find some more firewood!

Ellador's Horsekicks Ellador where it counts...and into the fire)

Ellador:YEOW!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah. Anyways,at Blasty...

Black Mage:X_X

Kirbyhas tied several rocks to him to prevent blowing away)

Samusis having fun making Peppy run from the horror and overall cheapness of Rahu III)

Peppy:Try a somersault!

Rahu IIIsomersaults onto Peppy,then blasts him with the Rahu III gun)

Basspulls out every attempt to kill X)

Xtakes no damage at all)

Yeah,general chaos.

Challenge time!

Sugnus:Today-

Karel:BLOOD...

Sugnus:ACK! CURSE MY POOR HP!(is torn to ribbons)

Drago Blimfenpops up out of nowhere,Ice Storms Karel into the ground)Like he was saying,today,you'll be stuck in a room with your worst nightmare. You need to try to defeat him/her/it/pie. Team that wins most wins. Blasty needs to sit one out.

Black Magevolunteers immediately,which is good,cause he'd never be able to kill Fighter)

Drago:Go.

Elladormeets Minos)

Nuclear Explosionoccurs as Minos and Ellador square off)

Rahu IIImeets Ray Legend with Wyrm gun,and Ultimate legs...which is bad,since Ray Legend's 6 air dashes can run circles around Rahu III)

Gandalfmeets...the Balrog)

Balrog1-13312 (V)3!!!!!!!!1111111111111shift+1

Gandalfhead asplodes from the 1337)

Drago:Gandalf loses. (revives him)

Xmeets Zero)Oh crap. (is pwnenized by Zero's 1337ness and uberness)

Drago:X loses.

Ellador's Horsekicks Minos' head off)

Drago:Ellador's Horse wins. FATALITY!

Bassmeets Megaman)

Second Nuclear Explosionoccurs)

Tymothimeets Amanda the Lancer)Err...can we talk this out?

Amanda:No chance.(jumps)

Tymothican't move in time)

CRACK!

Drago:Suffice it is to say Tymothi loses...

Rahu IIIshould've took a Ion gun into battle)

Ray Legendcame,saw,and pwninated)

Drago:Rahu III loses.

Arthasfinds Illidan)Oh pul-leaze. (kills him like last time)

Drago:Arthas wins.

Peppyfinds Pigma Dengar)

Stupid Advice Nuclear Explosionoccurs)

Bothare firing off streams of useless stuff explained in any decent walkthrough)

Kirbyswallows Meta-Knight)

Drago:Kirby wins.

Samusfinds a horde of Space Pirates)........-________________-(takes Wave Beam,utilizes Wave Buster combo)

Dragorecords the implosions of every single pirate)Samus wins.

Peppy+Pigmaare blabbing until...)

Falco:Geez,can't you help yourself?(flies by in Arwing,blows away Pigma)

Pigma:My beautiful reward! Aghaghagah!

Dragoeppy wins.

Ma Chaofinds Cao Cao...and his army...all powered up...)...crap?

Drago:Ma Chao loses.

Linkfinds Ganondorf...then everyone that participates in IFW topics on GameFAQs' SSBM social board mauls the Gerudo King)

Drago:Link wi-(Link is then mistaken for his accomplice and is torn apart by the granddaddy of IFW topic's,Mad Steve's,chainsaw)...nix that,he's down. Blasty wins. Also,since Harner's mad about him losing his game hosts,no rewards for you!

Falco:Something's wrong with the G-Diffuser!(crashes into Drago)

BOOM!

Rali Lutgenestgates in)Anyways,Slicey,council,now.

COUNCIL TIME LIKE OMGWTFBBQ

Rali:Just vote.

Blah blah blah,insert chatter here.

Rali:4 votes Ma Chao,2 votes Arthas. The tribe has spoken. (gates in a Balor to chase Ma Chao back)

Ma Chao's thoughts:I have no regrets!

...

...

...

Rali:Hey,where's Bass?

Bassis STILL fighting Megaman)

[JYAP]

Next day

Slicey

Tymothi=Wimp
Arthas=Uber Strong
Gandalf=Very safe
Me=Need to stop using = so much.
Me=Need to scratch last one.

Nothing good happening except the duel between Tymothi and his Kikuichimonji VS Arthas and Frostmourne. Lasted until they had to go to the challenge,then Link chucked a bomb between them. Boom.

Blasty

Bassstill fighting)

Not alot happening here either...well,X and Black Mage were MIA...but nothing else.

Challenge time!

Rali:...3 people are missing...one moment.

Megamansuddenly transforms into Astro Man,and runs away like the coward he is)

Bassreturns)

Xreturns as well)

Black Magetraded his left arm for a Black Buster)

Everyone:O_O

Black Mage:What?

Rali:Errr...anyways,it's time for...GAMEFAQS TRIVIA! Most questions wins. Pick a member from each team to answer the question after it's asked. GO!

True or False:TheUltramind12 on the Pikmin 2 boards is a n00b.

Ellador:True.

Black Mage:False!

Answer:False. Ultramind is actually a above-par RPer with good grammar.

How many IFW topics are there currently on the SSBM social board?

Tymothi:3.

Bass:What's a IFW topic?

Answer:4. metalkirby's bites though due to bad grammar,and Smash Master's doesn't count.

True or False:Florina>Farina>Fiora.

Arthas:False.

Peppy:Use the boost to get through!

Answer:False. In many board member's opinion on the FE ones,Farina>Florina>Fiora. 1 user is adamant on Farina>Fiora>Florina.

What skill does FFT agree upon as the best skill set-

Tymothi:MATH SKILL!

Answer:Yup. Nothing like CT5 Holy while your team has Chameleon Robes on a ninja.

What is the most popular phrase on the Star Fox boards?

Ellador:Caiman here. No problems...DO YOU COPY? EMERGENCY MANEUVERS!

Peppyo a barrel roll!

Answero a barrel roll!

.....Does anyone post at the arcade version of the Pong Board?

Samus:No.

Gandalf:.......................................... .................................................. .........(some 10 hours later)............................................ .......yes.

Answer:Amazingly,YES! Plus,there's a lot of funny paddles there too.

Rali:Slicey wins. Blasty,council.

COUNCIL TIME LEIK OMG!

Ralio it.

Peppy:You mean a barrel roll right?

Rali:No,I meant-

Peppy:Barrel roll?

Rali:No! I mean-

Peppyo a barrel roll?

Rali:GAH!!!!! PEPPY,THE TRIBE HAS SPOKEN,GET OUT!!!

Peppy's thoughts:What the heck?(realizes he quoted Wolf O'Donnel)NOOOOOOO!(asplodes)

ROB:Great Fox will cover you. (blows Rali up)

Harner:Ah great,out of decent characters to use for hosts. And we haven't even reached merger. Guess I'll need to call upon the cast of PSO to help me host. Episode III,that is.

[JYAP]

Next Day...


Hey,what's that black wave of Orcs marching towards both camps?

Harner:SAURON ATTACK! NO DRILL!

Huntersappear at Slicey's camp)

Arkzappear at Blasty's camp)

WAR!

Huntersstart summoning their weapons)

Arkzstart summoning their monsters)

Orcsare following Orc theory(Send a bunch of people after 1 guy))

Well,the Arkz have it easier.

Black Mage:HADOKEN!

2,000 Orcspoof)

At Slicey...

Orlandhas summoned 4 weapons,all Swords,and starts cleaving into the Orcs)

Kranzpicks off 2 with his Rifle)Got 2 already!

Kylria:17.(was using Shots)

Kranz:Grrr...

So you know,last night,I watched bout half of The Two Towers and The Return of the King on DVD,with extended scenes. I'll tell you my favorite parts at the end.

Glustargot his Evil Curst along with his Mag Preta,and casts Gibarta)

25 Orcs or sofreeze)

KranzBLAM)6!(BLAM)7!(BLAM)8!(BLAM)9!

Guykild:BZZZZZZT BZZT BZZZZT! GZZZZZT GZZZZZT!

100 Orcsimplode from hearing that)

Relmitostakes Caduceus in hand,casts Zonde on one guy,then smacks the crap outta another,then Bartas another,then whacks another...)

Stellais running really fast with Mechguns in hand,strafing the Orcs and pelting them with bullets)Don't you forget it,nyah!

Trollsstart coming,smash Stella away,destroying all her Mechguns equipped)

Stella:Owww! I'll get you,nyah!

Guykild:BZZZZZZT BZZ-(CRACK)(Guykild goes flying,and due to his pathetic HP,is not coming back)

Hunters:11 left.

Orcs:7,500 left.

At Blasty's...

All Arkzstart summoning Claws)

5,000 Clawsappear to challenge the 10,000 orcs)

Ohgunshoots a huge bazooka blast into the fray before the Claws attack,nailing 10 of them)

K.C.:Thou is taking the initiative? Very well. (picks off 5 of them with his rifle)

Lurablows away another 5)

Rufinauses Action card,doubles AP,then slicers 20)

Reizdoes not summon monsters excepting guard creatures,and charges into the fray,slicing and dicing with her Partisan of Lightning)

Black Mage:You guys are weak! (starts sniping with his Black Buster)

10 Orcskiss the ground each shot)

No other Arkz needs to fight now. The claws are doing great at killing,and there's Black Mage,shooting off a occasional Bolt-2 or Fire-3.

Eventually,they all die. Too bored to type rest of battle.

Harner:Since Gandalf attracted Sauron,he is voted out automatically.

Gandalf:I contest!

Harneris using the C.A.R.D. system,plays Sange Yasha,cheats,and plays Savitri as well,then attacks with Slash-Slash-SW Attack)

Harner's base AP:5.

Sange Yasha strength:4.

Savitri bonus:4.

Slash:+2 each.

SW attack:1.5x increase for sword attacks.

24 damage inflicted.

Gandalf=KOed.

Gandalf's thoughts:Curse you Sauron!



Favorite LOTR part time!

(Pre-Warg battle in The Two Towers,Gimli tries to ride a horse,then falls off)

Gimli:No need to be alarmed! That was deliberate!

(At Helm's Deep,during the attack)

Gimli:Got 2 already!

Legolas:17.

(After the battle,Gimli is sitting on a dead orc)

Legolas:Final Count:42.

Gimli:Well,not bad for some elven prince! I got 43.

(Legolas nocks a arrow,and shoots the orc Gimli was on)

Legolas:43.

Gimli:He was already dead.

Legolas:He was twitching.

Gimli:Oh yeah,he was twitching cause my axe is in his head!

(Return of the King,Pellennor Fields)

(Legolas climbs up a mumakil's leg via arrows,jumps to the rope holding the archers on,cuts it,causing the archers to fall down the opposite side of Legolas,who climbs up,nocks 3 arrows,shoots the mumakil's head,then walks down its corpse in front of Gimli)

Gimli:That still only counts as 1!

Maybe I got the exact quotes wrong,but yeah,that's pretty much how it went. I <3 Gimli...NOT THAT WAY YOU SICKOS!

Break:This is long enough as it. Will you end it already?

Fine...

[Felonious Monk]

Legolas is the man.

[JYAP]

Harnerue to BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIG annoyances,1 of each group of my new PSO staff will be fired. (presses a button)

Ino'lisdrops down a trap door for attacking and suiciding on a enemy right before I could win)

Pekoa giant cake is dropped in front of him)Oh boy!

Cakeeats Peko for actually killing me via friendly fire before I could kill the enemy)

Now,to the next day.

Arthas is extremely peeved that his alliance's objective ate it...and that's it.

Rahu III found a stockpile of Custom Robo parts-hey wait a minute! That's for the challenge!

(cue merge)

Black Mage likes Arthas' evilness,and allies with him with gusto,bringing Bass in as well.

Link doesn't get along very well...

Samus:Hey elf,move!

Linkwhacks Samus with boomerang)

Commence huge blownout fight about Link being called a elf.

Challenge time!

Stella:Today you'll be using Custom Robos,nyah! We'll face off in 2 4-ways,nyah,then we'll go to a 1 on 1,nyah! Any questions,nyah?

X:Why do you keep saying nyah?

Stellacue anime-style rage scene with Stella big and X small)FEAR THE NYAH,NYAH!

Everyone:O_o

Stella:Make your robos,nyah!

First Round:Ellador VS Tymothi VS Kirby VS Samus

(JYAP note:I describe the robo in this order:User,Robo,Gun,Legs. I don't bother with the pods and bombs,I never use them.)

Ellador
Halberd
Blade
Long Thrust

Tymothi
Metal Ox
Shotgun
Formula

Kirby
Peregrine
Knuckle
Formula

Samus
Milky Way
Sniper
High Jump

The colloseum for all battles:No-Man's Land

GO!

MW(Milky Way)distances self away from everyone,trying to get a good shot)

MO(Metal Ox)is sticking to the ground,trying to hit Halberd,who's dashing around and taking advantage of the stealth feature)

Grine(Peregrine)dashes for MW,and pounds away with the Knuckle gun,then changes targets and wrecks up MO,then runs back and is hit by a Sniper shot)

Halberdgets a clear shot,and unleashes a bunch of blades at MO,doling out major damage)

Grinenails Halberd too)

Long story short-wait,the battle lasted 20 seconds...anyways,Peregrine wins. Peregrine-Knuckle combo drives my friends up the wall,onto the ceiling,and across the room.

Next set:Bass VS Link VS Arthas VS Black Mage

Bass
Criminal
Gatling
Short Thrust

Link
Ray 01
3-way
Stabilizer

Arthas
Defender
Eagle
Long Thrust

Black Mage
Dour Head
Titan
Standard(he felt confident)

Go!

DH(Dour Head)tries its gun...only to realize it's a piece of junk! GAH!)

Defenderflies around,shooting Eagles at DH)

Ray 01doesn't have a problem hitting poor Criminal with the 3-way,despite the 3 dashes it gets)

Not a very interesting battle...Ray 01 wins. Continuous flight is no match for spreadfire.

Stella:Because of the bad attitude of X,and the fact Rahu III is illegal,they are both disqualified,nyah!

Kirby VS Link

GO!

10 seconds later...

Peregrine wins.

Stella:Kirby wins immunity,nyah!

Before council...

Black Mage:I say we vote out Rahu III. It's creeping me out.

Arthas/Bass/Ellador:Kay.

COUNCIL,NYAH!

Stella:Go,nyah!

Black Mage's alliancevote for Rahu III)You're too dangerous.

Kirby/Linkvote for Arthas)We don't trust you.

Rahu III/Samus/Tymothivote for Black Mage)You're a psychopathic killer.

Xvotes for Link)Because I can.

Stella:Let me tally the votes,nyah!...........4 votes Rahu III,3 votes Black Mage-

Black Mage:WHA?!?!?!?!?!

Stella:Shut up,nyah! 2 votes Arthas,1 vote Link,nyah. The tribe has spoken,nyah!

Rahu III's thoughts:...

[JYAP]

Next day...

Samus had smuggled her Plasma Beam and Flamethrower combo into the game and is now burninating everything near because she wanted to use Rahu III. And in other news,a garage jumper's parents sued because their son got hurt...P.S. they're suing the architect.

Challenge time!

Guykild:BZZZT GZZZZZT GZZZZAH GZZZZT BZZZZZAAAHHHHHHHHHH!(Translation:Today's challenge is...worth DOUBLE IMMUNITY! But Samus has illegally burninated everything and is disqualified. Anyways,in front of you are 4 Sega Genesises(plural of Genesis?). Each has a copy of Blades of Vengeance. You will pair up,choose a character,and compete to beat the game. Farthest wins. If there is a tie,it's determined by how many lives you lost. Partner up!)

Black Mage:ARTHAS!

Ellador:Link.

Tymothi:Kirby!

X:Bass?

Bass:WHY?!?

Guykild:BZZZZZZZZT BZZZZAH GZZZZZT GZZZAHHHHH BZZZZZZZZT!

Black Mage:What?

Translator Robot:...you don't wanna know. Go!

Level 1,the volcano!

Black Mage is thoroughly disappointed by the wizard's lack of SMDs. Arthas,as the barbarian,has a innate greed and takes everything in sight,much to Black Mage's annoyance.

Black Mage:I NEEDED THAT HEALING!

Ellador and Link,as barbarian and huntress,have the problem that Link doesn't speak Elvish. Still,they cooperate fairly well.

Tymothi and Kirby with huntress and wizard,get along VERY well. They do pretty fine as well.

X and Bass...wait,nevermind,Bass suicided all of his lives to get out of playing with X...who has never been injured yet?!? With the barbarian?!?

Eventually,the first boss rolls around. It's a creature inside a firey cloud of,ummm,fire,that sends small walking fireballs after you. Afterwards,it pops out its head and shoots eyeblasts at you. It's vulnerable doing this.

X makes short work of him in a record 30 seconds.

Black Mage loses a life thanks to Arthas hogging all the Healings.

Tymothi and Kirby do well as well. Ok,that did not sound right.

Ellador uses up his last Healing warding off the fireballs,while Link used a Force Field by accident,confusing it for a Healing.

All get by.

At the shop,Arthas unknowingly mistakes the Invisibility potion for Invincibility,and blows all his cash on it. Everyone else gets Healings.

Level 2,the haunted castle!

Arthas doesn't know how to block,and loses a life to the clubmen on the level. Black Mage eventually picks them off.

X utilizes every secret he knows,and chalks up a LOT of silver.

Ellador loses a life trying to jump to a platform Link jumped on,and fell to his doom.

Tymothi and Kirby get by safely,but use 1 or 2 Blast Wands.

Level 2's boss! It's the ghost of a king. It appears in 1 of 5 spaces at the start,shoot 2 blasts of energy,and solidify for a couple seconds,then disappear and repeat the process. To cause damage,hit him while he's solid. Eventually,he'll appear on the ground(and on you if you're not moving!),solidify for longer periods,and shoot a blast when he disappears.

Arthas loses a life and his Healings here cause he didn't block.

X wastes him,taking 2-3 hits in the process.

Tymothi used his Strength scroll to speed it up.

Link didn't know Blast Wands don't hurt bosses,and uses them all in vain,along with a few Healings.

At the shop,more Healings,cept for X,who skips it.

Level 3,the tower!

Ellador falls to his death again.

Arthas loses his last life to the axe-wielding werewolfs,while Black Mage gets wasted once because of the Healing hog.

Tymothi and Kirby did fine.

X blazes through.

Level 3 boss! It's a medusaesque head that shoots energy blasts at you and bounces around the room in energy form...and that's it. Due to the raw power though,my mom and I used most of our Force Fields here.

X has no problem...cept for using 1 Force Field.

Black Mage is finished here.

Link loses a life here,trying to minimize Force Field loss.

Kirby lost his last Healing.

At the shop,X snags the armor pronto. Ellador can't afford it,but Link can. Tymothi and Kirby both get it as well.

Level 4,the dungeon!

X uses his new flail's ability to be used as a offensive shield to good use.

Tymothi loses 2 lives due to the complexity and toughness of the level.

Ellador fell down the lift from a shortcut and is out of the game.

Level 4's boss! He's a nasty sai-wielding lizardman. He does TONS of damage(2 hits=1 Healing),and has a lot of health. If you didn't get the armor,you'll either die in the level or here.

Link wastes his Force Fields and Healings here and still loses a life.

Tymothi and Kirby take awhile,but they win safely(Read:Kirby shot him from the platform above).

X actually takes some damage and uses 2 Healings here,but lives.

At the shop,Link buys a 1-up,and X gets 2 and 3 Healings. Everyone else gets Healings.

Level 5,the tower!

The axemen take their toll here. Except X,everyone loses a life,and their Healings.

Link jumped on the wrong part of the lift and fell to his death.

Linkin Hylian)NOOOOOOOO!

Game:Continue?

Linkchooses yes,and is returned without his items to the game)

Tymothi isn't as fortunate,and is out.

X starts using more Healings than before.

Level 5's boss! See level 3's,only in a smaller room.

Link loses 2 lives due to lack of Force Fields.

Kirby also loses a life here.

X found the pattern,and takes no damage mauling the boss.

At the shop,the usual. X buys more lives,and Kirby gets a life as well. (pun intended)

Level 6,the city!

Compared to the last one,this is a cakewalk. Just a few Healings here and there,and that's it...no wait,Link couldn't find out the guards with shields' weakness,and dies. That's all for him.

Level 6's boss! It's a vulturelike creature that drops rocks on you. Different color rocks have different effects. It swoops down if you're under it,which is the only time to hit it.

Kirby lost his life here.

X wins without a problem...ok,he used 2 Healings.

At the shop,X buys lives,Force Fields,and Healings to prepare for the monstrosity that is...

Level 7,the forest! (mirrors crack,a dam breaks,all the deer look up...yes,it's that bad)

Kirby doesn't even make it to the boss.

Guykild:BZZZZZZZT BZZZZZAH BZZZT!(X wins! He may continue playing if he wishes,because that's the reward for the challenge!)

X does so,but loses all his Healings at...

Level 7's boss! A giant head that shoots small projectiles,a buzzsaw missile,and more. No one will blame you for using everything you got here.

X used up all his Force Fields.

At the shop,X uses it all on everything he can get.

Level 8,the citadel!

I don't need to explain it now.

Level 8's boss! It's Manax,the evil dragoness that took over the land to begin with. With her two heads,she shoots blasts of fire and thrusts at you. If you have any powerups,use them now.

X uses it all up and wins,without dying,at all,with a Force Field to spare!

Everyoneis in awe)

Later,at a undisclosed location...

Xtakes off mask to reveal...)

JYAP(not Harner,not anyone else,me,as in,the guy typing this):Whew. That mask is hot. Wonder how long before they catch on,if at all...wonder if the real X is free...

In a closet...

X:Mmmmmph mmmmmph mmmmph!(is tied up)

Vivianathrows Teifu in same closet,not noticing X,also tied up)

Council. Now.

Guykild doesn't buzz at all,just signaling to vote.

Xvotes Bass)Quitter.

Black Mage's alliancevote Samus)Fire hazard.

Samusvotes Black Mage)Because you're a psycho.

Kirbyvotes Samus out of fear)

Everyone elsevotes Tymothi because they're jealous)

Guykild tells his translator to get the votes.

Translator Bot:Let's see...1 vote Bass,5 votes Samus,1 vote Black Mage-(Black Mage rises to protest,but is nearly gunned down by Guykild),2 votes Tymothi. Tribe has spoken.

Samus:But-GAH!!!(Guykild unleashes a hail of mechgun bullets upon her,blowing her away)

Samus' thoughts:I hate androids.

[JYAP]

(sirens go off in the base)

Harner:AUTHOR LAZINESS ALERT! NO DRILL! ALL SPRIGGANS SCRAMBLE!

(meanwhile,at my house...)

JYAPrubs his eyes open...to see a army of spriggans armed with sticks)...must be dreaming...

Spriggan:Ready for a wee bit of fun?

(10 minutes later)

JYAPhas a bunch of bruises and a black eye)

The next day,a time anomaly caused the days to go 2 days back,3 days forward,4 days back,then 3 days forward. Read:The next day you moron!

X...is looking surprisingly fine...hey waitaminute!

FLASHBACK LEIK OMG

In a closet...

The closet is filling with robots. So far it holds ROB64,Axl,Napalm Man-no,nix that,he's dead.

Mega Man:What? It's not like I blew him away because he had a sucky weapon!

Anyways,then Reiz walks by...hears the cries...frees them all...and enters a seek and destroy mission for their captor...ok,Teifu didn't get out.

END TEH FLASHBACKAGE

Whatever. Anyways,Black Mage is chasing Arthas around with his stabbing knife for sucking so much in the challenge.

CHALLENGE TIME!

Break:JYAP is getting tired of typing so much Survivor stuff and not doing what this thread was for,so this is the last challenge.

Red MageUN DUN DUN!

Black Mage:Where'd you come from and how are you still breathing?

Break:Anyways,for this challenge,there will be 2 stages. The first stage requires a partner. You will team up and fight another pair Mario and Luigi:Superstar Saga style. The second one is a competition on Star Fox Assault. Now,to balance it out on the first stage...(Break makes a motion,and some players are hit with a lightning bolt,reducing their strength)...good. Pick a partner...good...the matchups will be:

Black Mage and Bass VS Kirby and Link

Tymothi and Ellador VS X and Arthas

GO!

(cue battle music here)

Black Mage:60 HP,15 BP
Bass:80 HP,15 BP

Kirby:70 HP,25 BP
Link:90 HP,10 BP

Black Mage's turn!

BM finds out his Hadoken's been disabled. He attempts a Hand(read:Fire-3)attack on Kirby. He flunks the action and comically roasts himself like Mario would on a flunked Hand attack.

20 Damage! CRITICAL!(50 HP left)

Kirby's turn!

Kirby eats a mushroom.

20 HP!(70 HP left)

Link's turn!

Link tries a Jump attack on Black Mage,and gets the timing right.

15 damage!(45 HP left)

Bass' turn!

Bass uses his Tool(substitute for hammer)on Kirby and succeeds in the timing.

18 damage!(52 HP left)

Black Mage's turn!

BM tries Hand again and hits Kirby. This time,the timing is right.

28 damage! CRITICAL!(24 HP left)

Kirby's turn!

Kirby uses his Tool attack,and inhales Bass. He flunks the timing.

10 damage!(60 HP left)

Bass' turn!

Bass nods to BM,and executes a Bros. Attack! Well,more like a combo,but you know what I mean!

Bass chooses the Hand combo.

Bass charges up his buster with fire. He gets off 3 charges. He then fires them at Black Mage,who takes his dagger and stabs them. Each ball goes towards Kirby.

1st hit:11 damage! CRITICAL!

2nd hit:11 damage! CRITICAL!

3rd hit:Black Mage flunks the timing,and is lit on fire. He collides with Kirby for 6 damage.

Kirby spins,then falls down.

Link:Kirby!

Link's turn!

Link takes out his Tool,the bow,and aims at Black Mage. BM,however,dodges the attack.

Black Mage's turn!

Black Mage starts another Bros. Attack. He chooses Jump.

Black Mage jumps in the air,lands on Bass,and together they jump on Link. No timing mishaps.

30 damage! LUCKY!!!(60 HP left)

I will draw a veil over the rest of the match. Needless to say,Link was doomed. BM ended with 23 HP,and Bass still has full health.

Next match!

Tymothi:100 HP,5 BP
Ellador:80 HP,10 BP

X:90 HP,10 BP
Arthas:75 HP,0 BP

X's turn!

X starts a Bros. Attack on Ellador. He chooses Tool. X generates a hammer,and whacks Arthas,who shrinks to a ball. X then whacks him golf style at Ellador twice.

12 damage!

22 damage! LUCKY!!!(46 HP left)

Arthas' turn!

Arthas starts his Hand attack. To make up for his lack of BP,Arthas needs no timing. He whacks Ellador with a death coil.

20 damage! CRITICAL!(26 HP left)

Tymothi's turn!

Tymothi starts a Bros. Attack on Arthas. He chooses Hand. He flicks his wrist,then charges up a thunder blast. He jumps on Ellador,then jumps above X and Arthas,then unleashes his blast!

99 damage! CRITICAL! LUCKY!!!

X:Arthas!

Break:Foul!

Tymothi:What?

Break:Tymothi and Ellador are disqualified for illegally enhancing their power!

Tymothi:Grrrrrr...DIE!

New battle!

Break:999 HP

Break's turn!

Break slices at Tymothi with his Agito.

635 damage!

Tymothi spins,then falls.

Ellador:Tymothi!

Ellador's turn!

Ellador revives Tymothi with a 1-up Mushroom.

Tymothi's turn!

Tymothi slashes at Break with his Tool.

1 damage!

Break is angered at this,and counterattacks with Rafoie.

422 damage!

Tymothi:Mama mia...

Break:The second part will now start!

The stage:Simple Map 2.

The rules...anything goes.

So you know,it's BM,Bass,Arthas,and X.

BM=Falco
Bass=Wolf
Arthas=Fox
X=Slippy

GO!

BM slinks off with Falco's speed into a hidden spot in the map,while Bass finds a gatling gun and starts causing havoc. Then X finds a Landmaster. Beep beep. Still,it's pretty even until...

BM:Hey,what's this?(finds a Fireburst Pod)Oooooooooooh,cool!(puts it in the middle of the conflict and runs)

Everyonemove up to see WTF is that)

Podgoes kaboom,blowing up everyone with it)

Break:It's decided! Black Mage is the Sole Survivor and wins...

1 C.A.R.D. system interface!

A +5/+5 Keen Vorpal Dagger of Speed!

Robes to add extra spell slots for Hadoken!

A stress relief Fighter doll!

An Arwing!

Annnnnnnnnnnd...RED MAGE'S CHARACTER SHEET!

Black Mage:AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(snags stuff and flies off in Arwing)

Break:Thanks for playing!